Okay I'm working on a long ago started book and I can't decide if it should be in first person or in third. I've given you two connecting parts of the story one in first and one in third. Tell me which way you like it more!
The
ghostly bell ring sent shivers running down Winifred's spine. She was standing
at the edge of the village and the forest. Staring in disbelief and horror at
what she saw. Memories of the previous night flashed through her mind. Hands
shaking her till she had awakened, shrieks and cries as she dressed and slung
her ever packed belongings on her shoulder. Running, being dragged by a strong
hand through a burning village. The faces of soldiers, some jubilant others
somber, but none seeing her. Winifred opened her eyes, forcing the more
frightening images out of her head. She could still smell smoke on the air. The
village had been protecting her, and had been destroyed because of her.
There
were footsteps behind me but I didn't turn. I didn't care if it was a friend
or foe, death felt like a welcome prospect. Alain came to stand beside me. He
stiffened at the sight of what had once been his home. I closed my eyes
and felt them grow warm with tears. A boy on fire rolling on the ground, trying
to put it out. A little girl calling out to the familiar girl running with
Alain, asking why her mother wouldn't wake up. my eyes snapped back
open as I pushed the memories away. I was conscious of Alain standing
besides me, and knew I should say something to him."I'm sorry," I said, but couldn't think what else I could say. Then I broke and fell to my knees, weeping openly. "I'm sorry Alain, I didn't want any of this. I
should never have come here." Alain sank to the ground beside me, "it's not your fault," he said. "We took you in, we were all
willing to take the consequence".
So what do you think?
Try writing it in both perspectives, and see which you like better. or you could do both, as I have been known to do. ;)
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